Annoyances

There are things out there that just kinda annoy the piss outta me. Just stupid questions, and statements and such that we all are guilty of (myself very much included) that I want to share with all of you. Also, much like Chan, I am fond of lists and relish every opportunity to make one:

1. People who will spend 20 minutes searching the entire house for the remote control instead of walking 2 feet to the TV and changing the channel manually

2. The saying "You want to have your cake and eat it too." You're damn right. Why have the cake if you can't eat the fucking thing.

3. You lose something and some schmuck says "It's always the last place you look." No shit. Why would I continue looking after I found the damn thing I lost.

4. When a product claims to be new and improved. Well, which one is it. If it's new than there has never been anything before it hence no improvements could be made and if it is improved then there was a version prior to the "improved" one so its not new.

5. When someone tastes and/or smells something that is, by all appearances, the most God awful substance on the planet and then they offer it to you so that you may share in their private hell. What an asshole.

6. When people say "life is short." No, it's not. Living is the longest thing you are going to do (Judeo-Christian afterlife beliefs aside, that is). What are you going to do that is longer than life?

7. Why do people always have to use their thumb and pinky finger in some asinine "I'm holding a phone" gesture when they want you to call them?

So, these are just some of those things. Thanks for tuning in. I'm here all week, please tip your waitress.